A Moving (and Suriprisingly Funny) Reflection on Life and Death
As part of its free weekly “Classics” screenings, Global Health Film is showing ‘I Am Breathing’ online on Sunday 26th July at 19:00 BST, followed by a panel discussion between Emma Davie, co-director I Am Breathing, Louise Oswald, Neil’s widow and Martin Turner, Professor of Clinical Neurology and Neuroscience, Oxford.
Book your free ticket and see what films are up next in the series here.
‘I Am Breathing‘ opens to hazy, muted snippets of life: blurry headlights in the night, trees passing under a blue sky, a young man’s smile and bare feet as they run across a sandy beach. Type appears on a computer screen:
“I am Neil. 8 months ago I was diagnosed with Motor Neurone Disease at the age of 33. This blog has been created to help me tell my story, a tale of fun and laughs with a smattering of upset and devastation.”
What follows is a surreal and moving dichotomy of a man’s story, told through his life and his death, aptly and sensitively portrayed by directors Emma Davie and Morag McKinnon.
Neil reflects on his life through home video clips, photographs and a letter to his infant son. At the same time, he reports his degrading physical condition to his blog with a regular dose of dry humour that, despite what you might expect, keeps the film lively, almost upbeat and certainly not depressing.
Its the questions it provokes in the viewer that makes ‘I Am Breathing’ so powerful. Like Neil, we find ourselves grappling with questions about our lives and what makes them worthwhile. As we familiarise ourselves with his home, his friends and his family, Neil becomes more and more relatable. He partied in his youth, made lifelong friends, fell in love and started a family. Is there any more to life?
As we observe his interactions with his wife Louise, the love and care with which she nurses him and their almost voiceless understanding, the answer seems obvious. And when you find yourself looking back on the film (trust me, you will), it’s their unshakeable bond that endures in your memory.
Oscar, Louise and Neil
The peculiarity of Motor Neurone Disease (also known as Lou Gehrig’s Disease), is that it slowly shuts down the brain’s connection to the body, first removing the ability to move limbs and eventually removing the ability to speak or even swallow, along with to keep itself alive.
As Neil conveys through his blog, it’s a cruel and weird way to die. On occasion the film is too slow, but these written updates not only inject some much needed pace, they’re also poetic and thoughtful. You’ll find yourself wishing more were featured in the film. His 100th post, in which he announces his decision to pull the plug, entitled “99, 100... Coming Ready or Not”, is just a full of life and character despite his physical inability to type it himself.
‘I Am Breathing’ is a unique film: an honest and down-to-earth meditation on what it means to be alive.
As part of its free weekly “Classics” screenings, Global Health Film Festival is screening ‘I Am Breathing’ online on Sunday 26th July at 19:00 BST, followed by a panel discussion between Emma Davie, co-director I Am Breathing, Louise Oswald, Neil’s widow and Martin Turner, Professor of Clinical Neurology and Neuroscience, Oxford.
Book your free ticket and see what films are up next in the series here.
